7 Players Who Definitely Wouldn't Be Able to Successfully Flip a Pancake

It's Pancake Tuesday (Spurs are in the spirit) and there's only one question which needs answering - to flip or not to flip?


Think about it:


After you've spent five minutes churning that batter you know it's time for the ultimate challenge. You scream for all your mates to gather around. The neighbours peek from behind their curtains. You have your audience - this is your time to flip. 


Seconds slow down. Heart starts pounding. You give the pan a flick of your wrist. There it is, gliding through the air like some limbless God. The pancake is on its way back down as you peer through the corner of your eye - making sure that everyone's still paying attention. 


One, two, three whole flips! You might not have meant all three but you'll take them. You give a cheeky wink to no one in particular as your mates gawp with envy. You've bloody done it! 


Yes, they might get paid a little more, but which footballers can do what you've just done? Well, here are seven who certainly can't - according to some in-depth analysis...

7. Luis Suarez

One thing about flipping pancakes is that you're running a big risk. Are you willing to sacrifice your two minutes of hard work? That pancake could find itself flat on the floor covered in a mix of tobacco, hair and Cheetos crumbs. Not very pleasant.


Simply put, Suarez seems like a hungry bloke and would probably want to get his teeth stuck in as soon as possible. No flipping for the Barcelona star.

6. Neymar

Would Neymar go for the simple one-handed flick? No, of course he wouldn't. 


The Brazilian would heel flick that pan 15 feet into the air before volleying the pancake against the fridge, couple of step-overs then - to finish it all off - a nutmeg. 


That poor pancake would suffer.

5. Peter Crouch

If Crouch isn't the tallest player in the Premier League then he should be. The man loves a header and if he's not scoring then he's probably off raving in Ibiza (see Youtube for proof). 


However, his greatest strength is also his greatest weakness when it comes to pancake flipping - he's just too tall.


That pancake would go for three orbits around the Earth before it returned. Not sure he has the patience for that. 

4. Jesse Lingard

Going by his social media accounts, Lingard gets excited quite easily. 


When it comes to pancake flipping, you need to stay calm and assured. You can't let the moment get to your head. 


Unfortunately for 'Messi Lingard', that's exactly what would happen. It would start off alright, but the moment that pancakes out of the pan, his eyes would light up like a dog chasing his stick. The excitement would be overwhelming and 'Lings' would probably break out into a spasm of dabs. 

3. Joey Barton

Joey Barton loves a baguette ever since his move to Marseilles back in 2012. Joey, preferred to be known as Jean since, spent a season perfecting his English with a French accent on the South coast. 


Despite all the talk, Barton's just not up to the job of flipping. A subtle flick of the wrist is required and Jean is too aggressive. Most of the pancakes would end up stuck to the ceiling and he'd eventually end up in a fit of rage. 

2. Wayne Rooney

No pancake flipping for Wayne, the idea is just too continental for his liking. 


The former England captain needs his pancakes extra well done and cooked to the sound of God Save the Queen. Anything else is just a distraction.

1. Mario Balotelli

It would be a sight to behold, watching Balotelli cook some pancakes. Nothing's made simple when it comes to the former Manchester City striker, and he would definitely put some effort into his flipping. 


Nevertheless, his exuberance would get the better of him. Everything would be going well, the pancake would be halfway in the air - good technique thus far - then, all of a sudden, he lets off fireworks in the background and the kitchen ends up burning down. No flips and no pancakes. Not good.